I have been thinking lately about positive parenting. Actually, since we know that what we do down here in this world affects the way things are in the spiritual realm, I think if we all make an effort to do more positive parenting, Hashem will do the same!
I know there are times we simply find it very hard to deal with certain children....but we have to try to look past the negative qualities and focus on the neshomah and inherent good in that child. And by believing in your child and emphasizing the positive, we can actually bring out into revelation the good qualities the child has and hence help to get rid of the negative qualities.
Besides the fact that some kids look for negative attention (possibly because they lack positive attention? or possibly because they lack self esteem...) we as parents have to do our best to be positive with our children.
When a child is not well behaved, somehow we as parents feel that it reflects on us and we see our own faults and failures in our kids. that naturally makes us feel threatened or embarrassed or even depressed. We therefore tend to criticize those kids or distance ourselves somewhat from the kids...but that only makes things worse.
WE have to do our best to find the good in each child and to ignore or play down the negative qualities. Of course if a child is really displaying terrible behavior and having a negative influence on other children at home, we have to take a stand and make our position clear but everything should be done with the least amount of criticizm or putting down as possible.
May our efforts at more positive parenting also help Hashem to react more positively towards us, with more chesed and rachamim and without being judgmental....